When your in a committed relationship or married, unless your partner was unlucky with his parents you automatically adopt what we call “in laws”.
The term “in-laws” has been made a bad thing by media such as movies and tv shows like meet the fockers or everybody loves raymond but it doesn’t always have to be like that.
Remember your partner comes from them so respect is needed. The fact they are older than you should also constitute respect in some form.
Although it’s always pleasant, one doesn’t have to be best buds with the inlaws to make visits peaceful. Accommodating them with compliments upon arrival shows you care as well as if you know they like coffee have a pot brewed just in time.
Avoid topics you know you won’t win them over with. If your father in law gets all riled up or knows everything about stocks, let it go. Agreeing to disagree is recommended a lot of the time.
Nobodys perfect but most adults become set in their ways that might not agree with yours but no point beating yourself up about it.
Do stand your ground in a polite way. Remember respect, you can still have it when placing boundaries like if your mother in law always critisizes your cooking, ask for a few tips. Or if your father in law critisizes how you hold a hammer, ask him for tips after all he is the more experienced one!
Sometimes they may sound harsh but like you parents are to you, they probably just care about the well being of their grown up child and his/her family (including you!)
So next time your partner says their parents are coming over, try welcoming them with open arms.
My parents in law aren’t perfect and neither am I but we love them. They have been there for us through some rough patches. We do have our typical family disputes but everyone seems to be willing to always forgive and move on. Which is how a real family should be. Get it out and get over it!
Some cases aren’t as easy but it’s always worth a shot to try and have a good relationship with not only the parents of your partner but they are also your kids grandparents and it would benefit everyone in the long run.